BRSM’s Draft Day Drinking Game

Can’t make it to The Machine’s Draft Day Party?  Well, that sucks for you.  But have no fear…we got your back.  “How can I make the Draft better?”, you ask yourself in amazement.  By playing The Big Red Sports Machine’s Draft Day Drinking Game.  It’s fun, it’s easy, guaranteed to impress the ladies, and you can play at home or at your favorite watering hole.  Here are the rules:

1. Draft catchphrases.  There are certain phrases you only hear during the Draft.  Why?  We don’t know, but we love them.  For this reason alone, we give ESPN the slight lean over the NFL Network for your Draft Day coverage.  That, and, Kiper.  Duh, winning!

The following phrases are worth a shot of beer:

  • Raw talent
  • Off-the-field/Character issues
  • Live arm
  • High motor
  • Straight line speed
  • Great Value/Upside
  • Dual threat
  • System quarterback
  • Pocket presence
  • Best player available
  • Intangibles or Measurables
  • War Room
  • New Regime
  • Edge Rusher
  • Gets to the Second Level
  • Quick feet
  • Plays in Space
  • Silky hips
  • Thick frame
  • Plays in the box (hey oh!)
  • Backside protector (hey oh!)
  • Generational talent
  • Hybrid

2.  Videos/references.  Each of these are beer-finishing worthy:

  • Reference to Mel’s hair
  • Video of Goodell’s basement
  • Player with matching suit and mask
  • First shot of Drew Rosenhaus in his newest client’s living room
  • First player to cry when their name is called
  • Reference to when Tom Brady was drafted (we’ll also accept Brady’s Combine picture)
  • Reference to Aaron Rodgers draft day slide
  • Video of Bill Tobin’s infamous “who the hell is Mel Kiper?” interview during the ’94 Draft
  • And this:
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3.  On the Clock Chug.  When your team is on the clock, you have to finish a full beer before the pick is called (shot of Jim Beam also acceptable). Note: if your team trades down, they’re on the clock twice, meaning two full beers. Cowboy up, it’s the Draft!

Basically, if it doesn’t look like this, you’re doing it wrong.

Beer Chug

Or this:

Beer Chug 2

Mock Draft 2.0 (Roid Rage)

Yes, only Version 2.0…we’re only 5+ hours from the draft, plenty of time for last-minute adjustments and/or inflammatory social media posts/pictures aimed at dropping prospect grades. So, for now…

I guess we’ll hold serve with Walker, the betting favorite, to be selected by the Jags. The Texans draft protection for Davis Mills and whomever the selected #1 in next years draft. I can’t buy the Thibodeaux slide. He’s a solid player/prospect at a premium position and fills an enormous need for Gang Green. I think the Panthers would love to trade down a few spots, grab a second round pick (they don’t have a second or third round pick this year…. there’s a reason bad teams stay bad) and still pick one of the QBs. If they thought Mayfield or Jimmy-G were an upgrade to Darnold they’d already have made the move. They should be able to find an upgrade to OL on Day 3 (but there definitely isn’t a plug and play QB available that late). Derrick Stingley is my top corner and I’m sticking to it!

Really wasn’t expecting a Charles Cross slide, as I think he could could make a ton of sense for the Giant or Panthers, but that’s just how the board fell. Saints get a gift.

There are a ton of quality WR’s in this draft. Given the market recent that occurred this offseason, it makes sense to get cost controlled help at the position. Dallas quietly has a ton of needs (OL, DL, WR)…gotta love watching Jerry drive that franchise into the ground. Crash and burn.

The Bills prepare for life after Jordan Poyer (and Rachel Bush!). I don’t buy the Breece Hall love. Cine will player a joker role on defense this year, while taking a starting safety job in 2023.

This entire draft will be wild, but picks 24-32 will be all over the place. The Lions take advantage of the 5th year option and potential draft the best QB in this class. Low risk, high reward at pick 32.

Mock Draft 3.0 (Ginger King)

Happy Draft Eve! We’re almost there friends! One day away from injecting pure optimism into your fanbase, unless you’re a Browns fan. I probably have another mock (or two) in me before the show begins, so let’s get right to it.

There’s a huge movement for Travon Walker going #1 to the Jags. He’s now the betting favorite to go first overall, which is wild to think of, as this has been a two man race for sometime. I think that speaks more to the fact that there is no clear cut Alpha dog, but rather a solid group of really good players that are close in range and ability. I can easily make a case for 5 people to be the first pick, which I don’t think I’ve ever been able to say before. I can’t see Malik Willis making it past Carolina…and no, I’m not buying the Baker Mayfield rumors. No team is going to trade a meaningful draft pick for him, they’ll just wait until Cleveland releases him.

One thing I am buying: the Kayvon slide. Once thought of as the top pick in the draft, teams are reportedly turned off by his personality and are questioning his commitment to the game. With a fanbase made up of mostly people from Long Island, the Jets care very little about personality. Another thing I’m buying: the Jermaine Johnson rise. Don’t be surprised if he gets drafted ahead of Kayvon.

The first half of the draft will be dominated by the line, both offensive and defensive. The second half will see a run on complimentary pieces; namely corners and receivers. There are two things I know for sure: 1. Never eat at restaurant that serves ranch with chicken wings. 2. The Green Bay Packers will select a receiver. Jameson Williams is one of the hardest people to place in the draft, based on his recent injury (same for Ojabo, too). If some team’s medical staff gives him the all clear, he could go as high as 8.

Here me out, Buffalo. I know you want a receiver or corner, but at this point Burks, Williams, Booth, and McDuffie are gone, and you don’t want to reach. Instead, what you do is re-watch the National Championship game and look for the baddest man on the field. That would be Nakobe Dean. He’s instantly Von Miller’s understudy, and the 1-2-3 punch of Von Miller, Tremaine Edmunds, and Nakobe Dean is scary. It makes all the sense in the world for Detroit to go qb at 32 (as opposed to two picks later at 34 in the second round), as they can lock in the team-controlled 5th year option.

Stay tuned tomorrow folks for my final mock, plus our Draft Day Drinking Game. Cheers!

Mock Draft 1.0 (Roid Rage)

Believe me John, it’s good to be back!  I took Ginger King’s advice to avoid the pre-free-agency-mock-draft-pitfall….might have taken it a bit too far.  But honestly, has there ever been a better year to follow that advice?!  The coaching carrousel has always been a thing, but now we’re seeing stud QB’s, WR1’s and First-Round draft picks being dealt like chips in a cheap poker game.  It’s fantastic!  And the crown jewel of the NFL offseason is less than a week away. Onto my first attempt at predicting the mayhem….

Aiden Hutchinson has long been a pick to kick-off the draft.  But really, do we have faith in the brain trust that handed bags to Christian Kirk and Zay Jones to make the sound, logic choice here?  The Lions have a tough choice, the stud defensive linemen from Michigan, or Malik Willis, the potential franchise QB. They really should grab Willis, redshirt him behind Goff, and have him take the reins in 2023.  But Hutchinson “falling” in their laps is too tempting.  They grab the local kid and re-evaluate their QB-strategy. 

It feels like the Jets have been hot to trot after every pass-rusher and wide-receiver this year, but naturally nobody wants to play for them.  At least the kids they draft can’t spurn them.  Big Blue grabs a couple of blue-chip SEC players to add actual NFL talent to their roster.

Picks 9-12 feel like too natural of a fit between player and team: the Seahawks love play-making corners dripping with measurables; the Jets land a player they probably would have draft at #4 if not for his knee injury; the team in Washington desperately need a Commander on the defensive side of the ball; the Vikings were historically bad at stopping the run last year.

The Eagles and Saints seemingly have the similar needs at WR and OL, so it’ll be interesting to see how they jockey with picks 15/16 & 18/19.

Devin Lloyd to the Patriots is my take-it-to-the bank pick this year (assuming he lasts this long); there isn’t a more Bill Belichickian player in this year’s draft than Llyod.  I think 3 QB’s go in the first round, but it’s hard to slot them in.  Teams will likely move around (up) the board to grab their guy.  In this scenario the Steelers step put and land a guy they hope is their future (but I think they’d rather draft an offensive linemen).  I’m here for the passive-aggressive middle-finger the Packers GM gives Karen Rodgers as he doesn’t draft a WR at 22. 

The board doesn’t fall great for the Bills, as they’d likely prefer McDuffie or Booth, but Daxton Hill is a hell of a consolation prize and versatile enough to be utilize in various defensive packages as a rookie.  There’s a Green Bay WR!  The Chiefs also begin life after Tyreek; George Pickens will thrive with Andy Reid and Mahomes (and be way over-drafted in fantasy this year).  The Lions close out the first round by getting their QB.  I think they’d sign-up for Hutchinson and Corral/Ridder.

That’s a wrap! Head on over to to start piecing together a mock of your own! Or don’t and just wait for my Mock 2.0 to drop!

Mock Draft 2.0 (Ginger King)

What a difference a week makes. Some big changes in the draft board, as teams look to fill voids through free agency. There has been quite the qb carousel. Deshaun, Russ, Matty Ice, and Carson all have new homes. Tom Brady back in Tampa (for now). And poor Baker Mayfield is left sending mix tapes to NFL teams. Baker’s a DUI away from fulfilling his destiny as Johnny Manziel 2.0. Speaking of Johnny Football, he seems to be doing just fine.

Anyway, all this does is drive the market up for this years’ qb class, as 5 teams in the Top 10 could use a new signal caller, with some lurkers farther down. We use the NFL Mock Draft Database for our mock draft needs.

No change at the top. Aidan should go first overall, either to the Jags (or, if you love rumors, Detroit). If the Lions don’t trade up, I could see them taking Malik. They’re a sneaky team that needs a qb…although it shouldn’t come as much of a surprise if you watched Jared Goff at all last season. I know Carolina needs OL help…but if Rhule wants to keep his job, he needs to draft a qb. I’m hearing lots of rumors that Thibodeaux is sliding…I would not be surprised to see him fall out of the Top 10 entirely.

The floor for Sauce is the Vikings, who would be ecstatic if he were there at 12. One name moving up the boards is Jermaine Johnson. If the Texans miss out on Malik, I think they’ll think long and hard about a qb at 13. Jordan Davis makes a ton of sense for Philly…instant succession planning from Fletcher Cox, who’s entering his 10th year in the league.

The Chargers are in a prime position to draft Williams. He doesn’t need to come in right away, and can take time to fully heal from his (Top 10 stealing) injury. Late round offensive lineman are never the sexiest pick, but Penning and Linderbaum are going to makes teams happy. Green Bay has to pick a receiver, or Karen Rodgers is going straight to the manager.

The Bills respond to Miami’s acquisition of Tyreek Hill by drafting Andrew Booth. Booth is arguably the most press-ready corner in the draft, and with Booth and a healthy Tre’Davious White, Buffalo’s secondary would instantly become tops in the league, and they’ll need it, especially when Tom Brady comes back into the AFC East. Free agency is still going to affect the draft. If (read: when) Kansas City trades for James Bradberry, their need to draft secondary help evaporates. One man’s pro-day injury is another team’s treasure, as Detroit could be in a prime position to draft Ojabo, and he, coupled with Malik, could be the offensive and defensive cornerstones for the Lions to build around.