BRSM’s Draft Day Drinking Game (2021 ed.)

Cheers!

Can’t make it to The Machine’s Draft Day Party?  Well, that sucks for you.  But have no fear…we got your back.  “How can I make the Draft better?”, you ask yourself in amazement.  By playing The Big Red Sports Machine’s Draft Day Drinking Game.  It’s fun, it’s easy, guaranteed to impress the ladies, and you can play at home or at your favorite watering hole.  Here are the rules:

1. Draft catchphrases.  There are certain phrases you only hear during the Draft.  Why?  We don’t know, but we love them.  For this reason alone, we give ESPN the slight lean over the NFL Network for your Draft Day coverage.  That, and, Kiper.  Duh, winning!

The following phrases are worth a shot of beer:

  • Raw talent
  • Off-the-field/Character issues
  • Live arm
  • High motor
  • Straight line speed
  • Great Value/Upside
  • Dual threat
  • System quarterback
  • Pocket presence
  • Best player available
  • Intangibles or Measurables
  • War Room
  • New Regime
  • Edge Rusher
  • Gets to the Second Level
  • Quick feet
  • Plays in Space
  • Silky hips
  • Thick frame
  • Plays in the box (hey oh!)
  • Backside protector (hey oh!)

New for 2021:

  • Generational talent
  • Hybrid
  • COVID (you’re going to get drunk)

2.  Videos/references.  Each of these are beer-finishing worthy:

  • Reference to Mel’s hair
  • Video of Goodell’s basement
  • Player with matching suit and mask
  • First shot of Drew Rosenhaus in his newest client’s living room
  • First player to cry when their name is called
  • Reference to when Tom Brady was drafted (we’ll also accept Brady’s Combine picture)
  • Reference to Aaron Rodgers draft day slide
  • Video of Bill Tobin’s infamous “who the hell is Mel Kiper?” interview during the ’94 Draft
  • And this:
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3.  On the Clock Chug.  When your team is on the clock, you have to finish a full beer before the pick is called.  Note:  if your team trades down, they’re on the clock twice, meaning two full beers.  Cowboy up, it’s the Draft!

Basically, if it doesn’t look like this, you’re doing it wrong.

Beer Chug

Or this:

Beer Chug 2

Mock Draft – FINAL (Ginger King)

It’s that time, folks. All of our weekends drinking beer and watching tape hard work gets put to the test. The Draft is here [cue: music]! Cleveland, get ready to rock! Our final mock has some surprises for you. Let’s get to it.

After the Top 2, it’s anyone’s guess. If you’re a Niners fan, start drinking now. I think they’ll come to their sense and go with Lance (and if so, the Mac Jones slide begins). If I’m a Bengals fan (or Joe Burrow’s knee) I’m really hoping they come to their senses and draft Penei Sewell. That’s the smart choice…but Ja’Marr Chase may be too tempting to pass up. Plus, there is a lot of OL depth, so it’s not completely unreasonable to take the consensus #1 receiver and then shore up the line in Round 2, say someone like Teven Jenkins or Wyatt Davis. Also, I think Detroit ends up with Parsons, and they’d love to be able to trade back a few spots and get him.

Denver misses out on Trey Lance, but end up with the Surtain, rookie DPY. Jerry Jones misses out on Surtain, but Horn is not a bad consolation prize. The Giants push all their chips in on Danny Dimes. I think their first two picks will be offense, with OL in the 2nd (wait, is it a good thing to mimic the Bengals???). Philly better order a truck load of Muscle Milk and peanut butter for Devonta Smith. I’ve had Kwity Paye as the first Edge off the board in all my prior mocks, but I think Jaelan Phillips has a shot to take the prize. Another flyer up the draft boards (and on the field) is Zaven Collins. Put him on the defense with JJ Watt and Malcolm Butler, and you have speed and power at all three levels.

The Mac Jones slide ends. Riverboat Ron takes another gamble. At least Mac will get to learn from Fitzpatrick (did you know he want to Harvard)? I actually can’t find fault with any of these picks. Each fill a gaping hole.

Lots of talk of Caleb Farley falling out of the first round…but I think he still goes. His floor should be the Saints. Baltimore needs to land a OL, and if Darrishaw is still there they are running to the podium. Buffalo’s offense will go high octane with Etienne in the backfield.

Follow us on Twitter as we live tweet the shit out of the Draft. Cheers!

Mock Draft 3.0 (Ginger King)

Happy Draft Eve! The mocks will start flying, as the smokescreens start to settle, and teams set in to the war room. Let’s get right to action.

Reports are the Niners are unsure what quarterback to draft, but I’m not buying it. They made this boneheaded, not well thought out, multi-year organizational setback franchise altering trade with one person in mind…and their institutional arrogance will keep them drafting Mac Jones. Pitts to the Falcons makes sense, especially with Julio rumors abound, but I disagree. Taking a TE at #4 is too high. Period. [sidebar: name me the top 3 tight ends in the NFL right now, and tell me where they were drafted] (spoiler alert: not in the first round). [second sidebar: name me the top 3 tight ends of all-time, and tell me where they were drafted] (spoiler alert: not in the top 10). Even with the more modern trend of tight ends as receivers, the positional value is just not there at #4.

Roid Rage is right on when he notes qb-needy teams will need to leap frog Denver, which makes the Lions at 7 (and Panthers at 8) prime candidates to trade down.

The Broncos will end up with a quarterback, and they’re hoping they can stay at 9 to get one. If Rashawn Slater’s on the board, he’s an absolute must for the Giants. Reports are that David Gettleman is in love with Devonta Smith, but 166 pounds??? He should’ve put some rocks in his shoes at his weigh in. I’ve been hearing a lot of chatter on Jaycee Horn rising up. Could be in play for any of the NFC East teams from 10-12.

Edge rushers are kind of flying under the radar, but I think they have a chance to be the most impact-ready position in the Draft. The more tape I watch of Jaelan Phillips, the more I like. The Jets may be tempted to double up on offense in the first round…but new Head Coach Robert Saleh comes from the defensive side of the ball…and needs to build a complete team.

Baltimore got completely fleeced pulled off a trade with Kansas City, and is now in the market for an offensive lineman. If you’re a Chiefs fan, you got to love this trade. Sure, you don’t have a first round pick, but you now have Orlando Brown, a proven pro-bowler, who instantly steps in at Left Tackle. Plus, he’s only 24. Elsewhere, Roid Rage is close to drafting Travis Etienne to the Bills, but I’m already sold. I’m telling you. Etienne is Dalvin Cook 2.0. Book it.

Mock Draft 2.0 (Ginger King)

A new week. A new mock. We’re under two weeks away from the show. A lot of changes to the big board, as teams are coming back from pro-day visits and starting their pre-war room negotiations. Let’s get right to the action, once again, using the NFL Mock Draft Database Simulator. Buckle up!

Again, no changes to 1-3. I’m a believer the Niners are going to draft Mac Jones. That’s the biggest gamble in the draft, especially after what San Fran gave up to move up to #3. I also think the Falcons are not going do draft a quarterback for a couple of reasons. One, they just restructured Matt Ryan’s contract last month…spreading out $21m in guaranteed money over the next 3 years. He’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Two, he’s still playing at a high level. He threw for over 4,500 yards and 26 tds last season, with a qb rating of 93.3. The Falcons would love to trade back, and target a cornerback or offensive lineman, but if not, there’s no harm in drafting Patrick Surtain II, the best corner in the draft. Elsewhere, Dan Campbell is looking to rip kneecaps off people. Micah Parsons is his guy.

Receivers and Edge rushers are going to dominate the middle half of the first round. Minnesota needs both, but they should have their pick of Edge rushers, and Kwity Paye edges out (pun intended) the rest. There would be some Belichick magic if Fields is around at 15, and I think it can happen. Fields is going to suffer (rightly or wrongly) from the stigma that OSU quarterbacks have not succeeded at the pro level. Not surprisingly, he’s gone on the offensive to explain how he’s different than his predecessors. His floor should be the Pats at 15, ironically the same spot Haskins was selected in 2019.

Rounding out the first round, I’m trying to explain to Bills Mafia that if Travis Etienne is on the board, he should be the pick. You heard it hear first: Travis Etienne is Dalvin Cook 2.0. However, the Bills need to get younger on the defensive side, as both Jerry Hughes and Mario Addison are on the wrong side of 30. Elsewhere, there are a few teams that I am locked into with their first round pick, and Kansas City is one of them. This pick has to be offensive line, particularly at tackle, as both starting tackle from last year (Eric Fisher and Mitchell Schwartz) are gone.

Mock Draft 3.0 (Final) – Roid Rage

We made it! Draft Day is here and this is my final wildass educated guess to make sense of it all…..

Round 1 TeamPick
1 Cincinnati Bengals Joe Burrow (LSU) QB
2 Washington Redskins Chase Young (OSU) DE
3 Detroit Lions Derrick Brown (Auburn) DL
4 New York Giants Jedrick Wills (Alabama) OL
5 Miami Dolphins Justin Herbert (Oregon) QB
6 Los Angeles Chargers Jeff Okudah (OSU) CB
7 Carolina Panthers CeeDee Lamb (Oklahoma) WR
8 Arizona Cardinals Andrew Thomas (Georgia) OL
9 Jacksonville Jaguars Tua Tagovailoa
(Alabama)
QB
10 Cleveland Browns Isaiah Simmons (Clemson) LB
11 New York Jets Tristan Wirfs (Iowa) OL
12 Las Vegas Raiders Henry Ruggs III (Alabama) WR
13 San Francisco 49ers K’Lavon Chaisson (LSU) LB
14 Tampa Bay Bucs Mekhi Becton (Louisville) OL
15 Denver Broncos Jerry Jeudy (Alabama) WR
16 Atlanta Falcons Javon Kinlaw
(South Carolina)
DL
17 Dallas Cowboys Xavier McKinney
(Alabama)
S
18 Miami Dolphins Joshua Jones (Houston) OL
19 Las Vegas Raiders C.J. Henderson (Florida) CB
20 Jacksonville Jaguars Ross Blacklock (TCU) DL
21 Philadelphia Eagles Justin Jefferson (LSU) WR
22 Minnesota Vikings Jaylon Johnson (Utah) CB
23 New England
Patriots
Patrick Queen (LSU) LB
24 New Orleans Saints Jeff Gladney (TCU) CB
25 Minnesota Vikings Denzel Mims (Baylor) WR
26 Miami Dolphins AJ Epensea (Iowa) DL
27 Seattle Seahawks Zack Baun (Wisconsin) LB
28 Baltimore Ravens Cesar Ruiz (Michigan) OL
29 Tennessee Titans Jordan Love (Utah State) QB
30 Green Bay Packers A.J. Terrell (Clemson) CB
31 San Francisco 49ers D’Andre Swift (Georgia) RB
32 Kansas City Chiefs Ezra Cleveland (Boise State) OT

NFL Draft – The Bets

Betting on the Draft will be at record levels tonight and through the weekend, as our sports-deprived country needs something to bet on.  If you’re one of the lucky one that lives in a state that allows mobile betting, congratulations.  Your self-isolation just got way more awesome.  Note:  this is the only time that I ever wished I lived in New Jersey. 

Ready to put that stimulus check to good use?  Here are our top bets for the Draft.  We’re using odds from Draft Kings Sportsbook

Total RBs Drafted in First Round (0.5) (Over -186, Under +150)

I’m all over the “Over” on this one.  This comes down to whether you believe D’Andre Swift will get drafted in the first round.  I think he’s a lock to go in the first round.  As a bonus bet, the line on D’Andre Swift’s draft position is 33.5 (-118).  I would hit the “Under” on that.  He’s going in the first round.

Easy Money

Total OL Drafted in the First Round (6.5) (Over -167, Under +137)

I’m going Under, especially at an attractive +137.  After the Top 4 offensive linemen, there’s a bit of a drop off.  This one will be close. I think 6 will be the magic number, and guys like Cesar Ruiz and Austin Jackson will slip into the second round.

Tua Tagovailoa Draft Pick (5.5) (Over +110, Under -134)

Lots of talk about Tua sliding past 5.  This line may shift throughout the day, but at +110, it’s worth a little scratch to bet the Over.

Slide or Smokescreen?

Jeff Okudah Draft Pick (4.5) (Over -134, Under 4.5)

Over all day.  The list of cornerbacks picked in the Top 4 spots is slim.  Two words: Positional value.  Cornerbacks don’t impact the game to the same extent as other positions (QB, DL, OL).  While Detroit may end up with Okudah, I don’t think it will be at #3.

Total Alabama Players Drafted in First Round (5.5) (Over +110, Under -134)

There are 4 Alabama first round locks (Tua, Will, Jeudy, Ruggs).  The next 2 Crimson Tide to be drafted should be Xavier McKinney and Trevon Diggs.  My money’s on that one of them slips into Round 2.

Exact order of First 3 Wide Receivers. 

Love this.  Getting in to multiple picks ups the degree of difficulty, and also the payout.  Lamb/Jeudy/Ruggs is the consensus, and at +300, it’s a good bet.  I also think Justin Jefferson has a shot to be the third receive taken, so I would also throw in a Lamb/Jeudy/Jefferson combo, which pays out at +1100. Also at +1100 is Jeudy/Lamb/Jefferson.

Happy betting!

Buffalo Bills 7-Round Mock Draft

I love the NFL Draft, every bit of it.  The film, the workouts, the combine, the prospects, the backstories, the pro days.  The annual smokescreens and anonymous scouts that have concerns over such and such prospect’s work ethic.  The unethical leaking of medical data, failed drug tests and Wonderlic scores.  I consume mock drafts, and assemble my own while trying to sift through the hype, hyperbole, stats and lies.  I love the draft almost as much as my Buffalo Bills.  So while it pains me that the Bills don’t have a first round pick, I’m more than happy and stoked with adding Stephan Diggs into the fold.  Was the trade worth it?  Hell yeah.  The additional picks the Bills threw in only amount to enough draft capital to move up 4 to 5 spots in the first round.  That would have got them to No. 17-18.  The top three wideouts (Jeudy, Ruggs and Lamb) are all likely to be gone….(they were in mine and GK’s latest mocks).  Plus, while those guys (and others in the draft) may be great, Diggs IS great.  There’s no praying and hoping.  The dude is a legit BEAST.

But alas, I can’t let the mocking season go by without making a few fake selections for the hometown team.  So here is my 7-round mock (courtesy of the Draft Networks Draft Simulator).  I selected for the Bills (no trades) and the sim (TDNs predictive board) picked the rest.  To the picks….

#54 Trevon Diggs, CB Alabama

Ya Digg?  The Bills don’t go on the clock until late Friday evening.  As Tom Petty (RIP) says, The Waiting is the Hardest Part.  But there are plenty of prospect to choose from, and I ranked them (for the Bills) in this order:  Ross Blacklock (DT, TCU), Kyle Dugger (S, Lenior-Rhyne), Tee Higgins (WR, Clemson), Laviska Shenault Jr. (WR, Colorado), Jalen Reagor (WR, TCU), Curtis Weaver (DE, Boise State).

The pairing of Blacklock and Ed Oliver is tempting to say the least.  Dugger could fill the role of “big nickel” that the Bills have been trying to develop since Sean McDermott’s arrival.  But in the end, it was too hard to add a productive CB that should develop alongside Tre White for years to come.  The secondary was a strength that just got stronger.   Who’s ready for an all Diggs training camp?!

#86 Bryan Edwards, WR South Carolina

The debate for this selection was between Edwards and Darrell Taylor (EDGE, Tennessee).  The Bills don’t have many (any?) long term options at defensive end.  Getting some pressure of the edge would take this defense to another level….and pass rushers are hard to find beyond this point in the draft.  But this season, and this team will be defined by Josh Allen.  Edwards gives the Bills something they don’t have much of at receiver: size (6’3”, 215 lbs.) and physicality.  The Bills have the luxury of developing and bringing him along slowly while at the same time having a physical weapon to deploy in the redzone.  Yes please!

#128 Kenny Willekes, DE Michigan State

I just said it’s hard to find push rushers later in the draft, so when Kenny Willekes was available in the 4-round I pounced.  Probably a better run defender (edge-setter) than pure pass-rusher, but that should remind Bills fans of Shaq Lawson.  Similar production at a fraction of the cost = smart team-building.

#167 Geno Stone, S Iowa

I passed up Kyle Dugger in the 2nd round, so take Stone here as a developmental safety/big-nickel defender.  At 5’10”, 210 lbs. he lacks the length the Bills covet in their DBs, but he is a excellent zone defender who can contribute on special teams.

#188 Patrick Taylor Jr., RB Memphis

I’m not convinced the Bills are settled with their backfield; seems like they’ll add someone to compliment Singletary.  Not thrilled with Taylor Jr. as a prospect, but he is a load at 6’3”, 227 lbs. and should be able to carve out a short yardage role.

#207 Brandon Mann, P Texas A&M

Dude, I can’t take another year of Corey Bojorquez….

#239 Kendall Coleman, EDGE Syracuse

Taking a chance on the SU product and his relentless motor.  Also considered another dart throw at WR or OT.

Bills Mafia, we breaking tables or what?!

Mock Draft – Roid Rage 2.0

This is not a drill, we’re 5 days out from real virtual NFL Draft 2020! These GMs get to deal with all the work-from-home pleasantry’s the rest of us have put up with: children bouncing of the walls, pets annoyed that you’re ruining their nap schedule, endless emails and calls from co-workers whom can’t figure out their own shit, amazon delivery trucks driving up and down the street and your spouse….just doing spouse things (what, Mrs. Rage reads this shit too!)….

And like the rest of us, by 8 PM on a Thursday, I hope they don’t do their best work sober….

I’m still going with Simmons to the Lions at 3. I think they’d love to slide down a few slots, still nab a blue-chip prospect and pick up a few extra draft picks, but won’t find a willing dance partner. Simmons is the ultimate “position-less” defender that can be deployed all over the field in any given situation. A true difference-maker, and how many of those does Detroit have?

There are very few scenarios where I don’t see the Giants and Cardinals taking and OT. Both Wills and Wirfs are day-one starters (and upgrades) for both teams, and help ensure the protection, growth and development of second-year QBs. I do like the fit of Derrick Brown for the Cardinals, but the Panthers snipe him in this mock.

Jalen Ramsey’s (much cheaper) replacement falls right into the Jaguar’s lap as they happily end Okudah’s mini-slide. I fully anticipate Ruggs, Lamb and Jeudy to be gone in the first half of the first round. I think Jeudy is the best of the bunch, but can see the Jets getting intoxicated with Ruggs’ speed; the Raiders going for the we-just-moved-to-Vegas-and-want-to-put-on-a-show type of player in Lamb. A second mock, a second OT for the Tompa Bay Bucs. Barf.

You could flip-flop Kinlaw and Chaisson, as both of those players make a ton for sense for either the Falcons or Cowboys. Josh Jones makes it five tackles in the first 18 picks. Even after being the most active team in free agency, the Dolphins have no shortage of holes to fill and none more pressing than OL. After next weekend they could have three new offensive linemen, all of which will probably start Week 1. This pairing of players to team, from 19 – 22 is my favorite. The Raiders need another corner…Queen gives the Jags a presence up the middle…Carson Wentz will be doing back flips and shots of grape juice to celebrate getting a WR…and the Vikings love drafting DBs. Jordan Love is the hardest player to peg. Is there a team willing to go up to into the first half of the draft to grab him? Would the Patriots and Saints pass on him at 23 and 24, respectively? I can’t see it happening. This feels like his floor.

These last 8 picks are fluid. I’ve only got 3 of the same players in this grouping compared to Ginger King’s Mock Draft 2.0 (although we both are calling our shot with Kenneth Murray to the Ravens). Since I have the Vikings grabbing a DB at 22, I give them a WR to fill the void left by Stefan Diggs. The Dolphins continue to remake their offense, and take a play-maker in Swift whom can take the pressure off Tua. Seattle is going to take the athletic-freak of their liking, I give them the uber-talented Jeremy Chinn but who knows, they are the hardest team to figure out. I’m lower on Kristian Fulton than most, but the patient teams in the bottom quarter of the draft can pounce one guys that slip a bit and get some great value.

Mock Draft – Ginger King 2.0

Alright, we’re back at it. Still quarantined, still working from home, and still trying to thread that needle of parent/teacher/caregiver (have you seen my kids?). On the plus side, I can now add “Professional Day Drinker” to my LinkedIn profile.

Anyway, we’re almost one week away from the Draft, you know, the event that not even a worldwide pandemic could postpone. Here’s our updated mock. Note: no trades are shown (yet), however, the first round will be full of them, especially at the top half, as teams will try to leapfrog over Miami each other to get Tua or Herbert. Obvious trading partners are Detroit and the Giants; both of whom should be whoring themselves out to drop back a few spots and collect additional draft picks.

As recommended by Roid Rage, I used the Mock Draft Simulator from the good people at Draft Networks. If you haven’t yet, get on over there and check it out.

Burrow and Young are locks at 1 and 2, respectively. 3 and 4 are where things start to get interesting. Simmons’ malleability to play anywhere on the defense could be too tempting for the Lions to pass up. The Giants should have their pick of Offensive Lineman…here, Joe Judge will rely on his Alabama connection and trust Nick Saban that Wills is the most pro-ready lineman. The Dolphins would be ecstatic to get Tua without having to trade up.

The run on wide receivers should begin just outside of the Top 10 (and maybe sooner if those OBJ trade rumors are true). Tompa Bay (god, he hasn’t even suited up yet and he’s already annoying) would run to the podium if Becton fell to them at 14.

Book this: Jordan Love will be a first round pick. With the exception of Philly, Minnesota, and Dallas (depending on what happens with Dak), all of the teams from 17-24 could use him, as well as some other teams at the end of the first round, like Green Bay. Philly has to come away with a receiver. Justin Jefferson is a nice consolation prize, if one of the Top 3 receivers don’t slip. The Jags overhaul their defense with a 1-2 punch of Derrick Brown and Grant Delpit, to help stop the bleeding from the loss of Jalen Ramsey and (soon to be) loss of Yannick Ngakoue.

D’Andre Swift has been flying up the boards…and come draft night, I would not be surprised if he ends up going in the middle/late first round. He would fit in perfectly with the Chiefs.