BRSM’s Draft Day Drinking Game (2021 ed.)

Cheers!

Can’t make it to The Machine’s Draft Day Party?  Well, that sucks for you.  But have no fear…we got your back.  “How can I make the Draft better?”, you ask yourself in amazement.  By playing The Big Red Sports Machine’s Draft Day Drinking Game.  It’s fun, it’s easy, guaranteed to impress the ladies, and you can play at home or at your favorite watering hole.  Here are the rules:

1. Draft catchphrases.  There are certain phrases you only hear during the Draft.  Why?  We don’t know, but we love them.  For this reason alone, we give ESPN the slight lean over the NFL Network for your Draft Day coverage.  That, and, Kiper.  Duh, winning!

The following phrases are worth a shot of beer:

  • Raw talent
  • Off-the-field/Character issues
  • Live arm
  • High motor
  • Straight line speed
  • Great Value/Upside
  • Dual threat
  • System quarterback
  • Pocket presence
  • Best player available
  • Intangibles or Measurables
  • War Room
  • New Regime
  • Edge Rusher
  • Gets to the Second Level
  • Quick feet
  • Plays in Space
  • Silky hips
  • Thick frame
  • Plays in the box (hey oh!)
  • Backside protector (hey oh!)

New for 2021:

  • Generational talent
  • Hybrid
  • COVID (you’re going to get drunk)

2.  Videos/references.  Each of these are beer-finishing worthy:

  • Reference to Mel’s hair
  • Video of Goodell’s basement
  • Player with matching suit and mask
  • First shot of Drew Rosenhaus in his newest client’s living room
  • First player to cry when their name is called
  • Reference to when Tom Brady was drafted (we’ll also accept Brady’s Combine picture)
  • Reference to Aaron Rodgers draft day slide
  • Video of Bill Tobin’s infamous “who the hell is Mel Kiper?” interview during the ’94 Draft
  • And this:
This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is Johnny-Manziel.gif

3.  On the Clock Chug.  When your team is on the clock, you have to finish a full beer before the pick is called.  Note:  if your team trades down, they’re on the clock twice, meaning two full beers.  Cowboy up, it’s the Draft!

Basically, if it doesn’t look like this, you’re doing it wrong.

Beer Chug

Or this:

Beer Chug 2

Mock Draft – FINAL (Ginger King)

It’s that time, folks. All of our weekends drinking beer and watching tape hard work gets put to the test. The Draft is here [cue: music]! Cleveland, get ready to rock! Our final mock has some surprises for you. Let’s get to it.

After the Top 2, it’s anyone’s guess. If you’re a Niners fan, start drinking now. I think they’ll come to their sense and go with Lance (and if so, the Mac Jones slide begins). If I’m a Bengals fan (or Joe Burrow’s knee) I’m really hoping they come to their senses and draft Penei Sewell. That’s the smart choice…but Ja’Marr Chase may be too tempting to pass up. Plus, there is a lot of OL depth, so it’s not completely unreasonable to take the consensus #1 receiver and then shore up the line in Round 2, say someone like Teven Jenkins or Wyatt Davis. Also, I think Detroit ends up with Parsons, and they’d love to be able to trade back a few spots and get him.

Denver misses out on Trey Lance, but end up with the Surtain, rookie DPY. Jerry Jones misses out on Surtain, but Horn is not a bad consolation prize. The Giants push all their chips in on Danny Dimes. I think their first two picks will be offense, with OL in the 2nd (wait, is it a good thing to mimic the Bengals???). Philly better order a truck load of Muscle Milk and peanut butter for Devonta Smith. I’ve had Kwity Paye as the first Edge off the board in all my prior mocks, but I think Jaelan Phillips has a shot to take the prize. Another flyer up the draft boards (and on the field) is Zaven Collins. Put him on the defense with JJ Watt and Malcolm Butler, and you have speed and power at all three levels.

The Mac Jones slide ends. Riverboat Ron takes another gamble. At least Mac will get to learn from Fitzpatrick (did you know he want to Harvard)? I actually can’t find fault with any of these picks. Each fill a gaping hole.

Lots of talk of Caleb Farley falling out of the first round…but I think he still goes. His floor should be the Saints. Baltimore needs to land a OL, and if Darrishaw is still there they are running to the podium. Buffalo’s offense will go high octane with Etienne in the backfield.

Follow us on Twitter as we live tweet the shit out of the Draft. Cheers!

Mock Draft 3.0 (Ginger King)

Happy Draft Eve! The mocks will start flying, as the smokescreens start to settle, and teams set in to the war room. Let’s get right to action.

Reports are the Niners are unsure what quarterback to draft, but I’m not buying it. They made this boneheaded, not well thought out, multi-year organizational setback franchise altering trade with one person in mind…and their institutional arrogance will keep them drafting Mac Jones. Pitts to the Falcons makes sense, especially with Julio rumors abound, but I disagree. Taking a TE at #4 is too high. Period. [sidebar: name me the top 3 tight ends in the NFL right now, and tell me where they were drafted] (spoiler alert: not in the first round). [second sidebar: name me the top 3 tight ends of all-time, and tell me where they were drafted] (spoiler alert: not in the top 10). Even with the more modern trend of tight ends as receivers, the positional value is just not there at #4.

Roid Rage is right on when he notes qb-needy teams will need to leap frog Denver, which makes the Lions at 7 (and Panthers at 8) prime candidates to trade down.

The Broncos will end up with a quarterback, and they’re hoping they can stay at 9 to get one. If Rashawn Slater’s on the board, he’s an absolute must for the Giants. Reports are that David Gettleman is in love with Devonta Smith, but 166 pounds??? He should’ve put some rocks in his shoes at his weigh in. I’ve been hearing a lot of chatter on Jaycee Horn rising up. Could be in play for any of the NFC East teams from 10-12.

Edge rushers are kind of flying under the radar, but I think they have a chance to be the most impact-ready position in the Draft. The more tape I watch of Jaelan Phillips, the more I like. The Jets may be tempted to double up on offense in the first round…but new Head Coach Robert Saleh comes from the defensive side of the ball…and needs to build a complete team.

Baltimore got completely fleeced pulled off a trade with Kansas City, and is now in the market for an offensive lineman. If you’re a Chiefs fan, you got to love this trade. Sure, you don’t have a first round pick, but you now have Orlando Brown, a proven pro-bowler, who instantly steps in at Left Tackle. Plus, he’s only 24. Elsewhere, Roid Rage is close to drafting Travis Etienne to the Bills, but I’m already sold. I’m telling you. Etienne is Dalvin Cook 2.0. Book it.

Mock Draft 2.0 (Ginger King)

A new week. A new mock. We’re under two weeks away from the show. A lot of changes to the big board, as teams are coming back from pro-day visits and starting their pre-war room negotiations. Let’s get right to the action, once again, using the NFL Mock Draft Database Simulator. Buckle up!

Again, no changes to 1-3. I’m a believer the Niners are going to draft Mac Jones. That’s the biggest gamble in the draft, especially after what San Fran gave up to move up to #3. I also think the Falcons are not going do draft a quarterback for a couple of reasons. One, they just restructured Matt Ryan’s contract last month…spreading out $21m in guaranteed money over the next 3 years. He’s not going anywhere anytime soon. Two, he’s still playing at a high level. He threw for over 4,500 yards and 26 tds last season, with a qb rating of 93.3. The Falcons would love to trade back, and target a cornerback or offensive lineman, but if not, there’s no harm in drafting Patrick Surtain II, the best corner in the draft. Elsewhere, Dan Campbell is looking to rip kneecaps off people. Micah Parsons is his guy.

Receivers and Edge rushers are going to dominate the middle half of the first round. Minnesota needs both, but they should have their pick of Edge rushers, and Kwity Paye edges out (pun intended) the rest. There would be some Belichick magic if Fields is around at 15, and I think it can happen. Fields is going to suffer (rightly or wrongly) from the stigma that OSU quarterbacks have not succeeded at the pro level. Not surprisingly, he’s gone on the offensive to explain how he’s different than his predecessors. His floor should be the Pats at 15, ironically the same spot Haskins was selected in 2019.

Rounding out the first round, I’m trying to explain to Bills Mafia that if Travis Etienne is on the board, he should be the pick. You heard it hear first: Travis Etienne is Dalvin Cook 2.0. However, the Bills need to get younger on the defensive side, as both Jerry Hughes and Mario Addison are on the wrong side of 30. Elsewhere, there are a few teams that I am locked into with their first round pick, and Kansas City is one of them. This pick has to be offensive line, particularly at tackle, as both starting tackle from last year (Eric Fisher and Mitchell Schwartz) are gone.

Mock Draft 1.0 (Ginger King)

It’s that time of year! The Machine is vaccinated and ready to mock. Where have we been, you ask? You’ve already looked at several mock drafts. Kiper’s on his 4th??? As a refresher, we’ll start with our usual reminder:

We know…there’s nothing sexier than looking at mock drafts. However, like a good Catholic, you need to resist temptation and wait until marriage. In this case, marriage is free agency. The Draft is shaped by free agency…and also trades, as we’ve seen several trades already, with teams moving into the Top 10 (Niners), moving out of the Top 10 (Eagles), and moving out of and then back into the Top 10 (Miami). With that said, here’s our first mock…check back often, as we’ll start to ramp thing up as we get closer to the big day.

Also, this year we hooked up with the NFL Mock Draft Simulator (a great way to spend an afternoon). Check them out https://www.nflmockdraftdatabase.com/

Now, on to the show.

The Top 2, and probably 3, are locked in. Atlanta’s a tough one to read…if QBs go 1, 2, and, 3, they could get an offer they can’t refuse from a real QB needy team (I see you Denver). Or they could take a stud WR like Ja’Marr Chase and give it another go with Matt Ryan. Smart money would be to draft Fields (we have him ranked ahead of Mac Jones) and let him learn from Matt Ryan. Elsewhere, Carolina, who just acquired Sam Darnold (many “expert” pre-free agency mocks had them locked on drafting a QB – see embedded tweet above) give him something he never had in New York, a true left tackle in Rashawn Slater.

The Giants, thanks to free agency, can go in a number of directions. They need to build up their offensive line, and would love it if Rashawn Slater were available. If not, if Kyle Pitts is on the board, he should be the pick. He would help with blocking, and also give Daniel Jones another weapon. Philly trades down and still ends up with Jaylen Waddle. Miami should have their pick of edge rushers and 18, and we love the upside Kwity Paye offers.

Heading to the end of the first round, this draft has a ton of depth at receiver. We have 7 (8 if you include Pitts) in the first round, but that number could easily be 9 or 10. Maybe we’re partial to Elis from Ole Miss…but we love Elijah Moore. Seriously, check out some tape. He will provide instant fire power to the (perpetually inept) Jets offense. Also, the Jags will want to surround Trevor with instant playmakers, and Kadarius Toney will give them a nice 1-2 punch.

Mock Draft 3.0 (Final – Ginger King)

Let’s get it on!

We’re finally here! Enjoy the Draft! Over/Under until we experience technical difficulties? 4.5 (bet the under).

What could go wrong????

NFL Draft – The Bets

Betting on the Draft will be at record levels tonight and through the weekend, as our sports-deprived country needs something to bet on.  If you’re one of the lucky one that lives in a state that allows mobile betting, congratulations.  Your self-isolation just got way more awesome.  Note:  this is the only time that I ever wished I lived in New Jersey. 

Ready to put that stimulus check to good use?  Here are our top bets for the Draft.  We’re using odds from Draft Kings Sportsbook

Total RBs Drafted in First Round (0.5) (Over -186, Under +150)

I’m all over the “Over” on this one.  This comes down to whether you believe D’Andre Swift will get drafted in the first round.  I think he’s a lock to go in the first round.  As a bonus bet, the line on D’Andre Swift’s draft position is 33.5 (-118).  I would hit the “Under” on that.  He’s going in the first round.

Easy Money

Total OL Drafted in the First Round (6.5) (Over -167, Under +137)

I’m going Under, especially at an attractive +137.  After the Top 4 offensive linemen, there’s a bit of a drop off.  This one will be close. I think 6 will be the magic number, and guys like Cesar Ruiz and Austin Jackson will slip into the second round.

Tua Tagovailoa Draft Pick (5.5) (Over +110, Under -134)

Lots of talk about Tua sliding past 5.  This line may shift throughout the day, but at +110, it’s worth a little scratch to bet the Over.

Slide or Smokescreen?

Jeff Okudah Draft Pick (4.5) (Over -134, Under 4.5)

Over all day.  The list of cornerbacks picked in the Top 4 spots is slim.  Two words: Positional value.  Cornerbacks don’t impact the game to the same extent as other positions (QB, DL, OL).  While Detroit may end up with Okudah, I don’t think it will be at #3.

Total Alabama Players Drafted in First Round (5.5) (Over +110, Under -134)

There are 4 Alabama first round locks (Tua, Will, Jeudy, Ruggs).  The next 2 Crimson Tide to be drafted should be Xavier McKinney and Trevon Diggs.  My money’s on that one of them slips into Round 2.

Exact order of First 3 Wide Receivers. 

Love this.  Getting in to multiple picks ups the degree of difficulty, and also the payout.  Lamb/Jeudy/Ruggs is the consensus, and at +300, it’s a good bet.  I also think Justin Jefferson has a shot to be the third receive taken, so I would also throw in a Lamb/Jeudy/Jefferson combo, which pays out at +1100. Also at +1100 is Jeudy/Lamb/Jefferson.

Happy betting!

Mock Draft – Ginger King 2.0

Alright, we’re back at it. Still quarantined, still working from home, and still trying to thread that needle of parent/teacher/caregiver (have you seen my kids?). On the plus side, I can now add “Professional Day Drinker” to my LinkedIn profile.

Anyway, we’re almost one week away from the Draft, you know, the event that not even a worldwide pandemic could postpone. Here’s our updated mock. Note: no trades are shown (yet), however, the first round will be full of them, especially at the top half, as teams will try to leapfrog over Miami each other to get Tua or Herbert. Obvious trading partners are Detroit and the Giants; both of whom should be whoring themselves out to drop back a few spots and collect additional draft picks.

As recommended by Roid Rage, I used the Mock Draft Simulator from the good people at Draft Networks. If you haven’t yet, get on over there and check it out.

Burrow and Young are locks at 1 and 2, respectively. 3 and 4 are where things start to get interesting. Simmons’ malleability to play anywhere on the defense could be too tempting for the Lions to pass up. The Giants should have their pick of Offensive Lineman…here, Joe Judge will rely on his Alabama connection and trust Nick Saban that Wills is the most pro-ready lineman. The Dolphins would be ecstatic to get Tua without having to trade up.

The run on wide receivers should begin just outside of the Top 10 (and maybe sooner if those OBJ trade rumors are true). Tompa Bay (god, he hasn’t even suited up yet and he’s already annoying) would run to the podium if Becton fell to them at 14.

Book this: Jordan Love will be a first round pick. With the exception of Philly, Minnesota, and Dallas (depending on what happens with Dak), all of the teams from 17-24 could use him, as well as some other teams at the end of the first round, like Green Bay. Philly has to come away with a receiver. Justin Jefferson is a nice consolation prize, if one of the Top 3 receivers don’t slip. The Jags overhaul their defense with a 1-2 punch of Derrick Brown and Grant Delpit, to help stop the bleeding from the loss of Jalen Ramsey and (soon to be) loss of Yannick Ngakoue.

D’Andre Swift has been flying up the boards…and come draft night, I would not be surprised if he ends up going in the middle/late first round. He would fit in perfectly with the Chiefs.

Mock Draft – Ginger King 1.0

The show will go on.

Welcome back everyone.  How’s the self-isolation going?  If it’s anything like ours, you spend your days yelling at your kids and your Boomer parents about the importance of quarantining.  No mom, it’s no ok if you just go to your Condo Association Happy Hour “for just a little bit.”  Seriously, we should build a wall around Florida.

In all honestly, this whole COVID thing wasn’t really impacting my daily activities or outlook on life, until it started to impact the Draft.  Now, shit’s getting real.  It’s the age old question:  Who blinks first when a worldwide pandemic threatens the greatest sporting event of the year?  I’ll tell you who doesn’t:  Roger Goodell.  There is nothing this man can’t do.  Need proof of this man’s greatness?  How about the recent CBA vote.  What’s Roger’s answer to combating player safety?  Two words:  More.  Football.  And the players approved it. 

So you just knew what his response was going to be when everyone said the Draft would have to be postponed.  No fucking way.  The show goes on because RG1 says so.  Sure, the public’s not invited, Kiper and McShay have to be 6 feet apart, and the home office is now the war room.  But none of that matters.  Despite all of the inconveniences that will occur during the 2020 Draft, what the people need is football.  Our society is starved for sports.  Ginger King’s wife busted him watching Esports (loves me some Evil Geniuses).  It’s bad.  Real bad.  The Commissioner knows this, and that’s why the 2020 Draft will be the most watched draft in history.  To use an analogy from a sport everyone has already forgotten, all the man does is hit dingers.

Anyway, we have much to catch up on.  Usually, we like to start with just the tip, and give you our Top 10 picks.  However, we’re going balls deep (just like this year’s WR and OL class).  Here’s my entire first round mock. 

Round 1 TeamPick
1 Cincinnati Bengals Joe Burrows (LSU) QB
2 Washington Redskins Chase Young (OSU) DE
3 Detroit Lions Jeff Okudah (OSU) CB
4 New York Giants Tristan Wirfs (Iowa) OL
5 Miami Dolphins Tua Tagovailoa
(Alabama)
QB
6 Los Angeles Chargers Justin Herbert (Oregon) QB
7 Carolina Panthers Isaiah Simmons (Clemson) LB
8 Arizona Cardinals Derrick Brown (Auburn) DL
9 Jacksonville Jaguars Andrew Thomas (Georgia) OL
10 Cleveland Browns Jedrick Wills (Alabama) OL
11 New York Jets Ceedee Lamb (Oklahoma) WR
12 Las Vegas Raiders Jerry Jeudy (Alabama) WR
13 San Francisco 49ers Javon Kinlaw
(South Carolina)
DL
14 Tampa Bay Bucs Mekhi Becton (Louisville) DL
15 Denver Broncos Henry Ruggs III (Alabama) WR
16 Atlanta Falcons K’Lavon Chaisson (LSU) LB
17 Dallas Cowboys Trevon Diggs (Alabama) CB
18 Miami Dolphins Austin Jackson (USC) OL
19 Las Vegas Raiders Patrick Queen (LSU) LB
20 Jacksonville Jaguars Xavier McKinney
(Alabama)
S
21 Philadelphia Eagles Justin Jefferson (LSU) WR
22 Minnesota Vikings Tee Higgins (Clemson) WR
23 New England
Patriots
Yetur Gross-Matos
(Penn St.)
DL
24 New Orleans Saints Jordan Love (Utah St.) QB
25 Minnesota Vikings Kristian Fulton (LSU) CB
26 Miami Dolphins Jonathan Taylor
(Wisconsin)
RB
27 Seattle Seahawks Ross Blacklock (TCU) DL
28 Baltimore Ravens Joshua Jones (Houston) OL
29 Tennessee Titans Marlon Davidson
(Auburn)
DL
30 Green Bay Packers Kenneth Murray
(Oklahoma)
LB
31 San Francisco 49ers C.J. Henderson (Florida) CB
32 Kansas City Chiefs Damon Arnett (OSU) CB
Congrats on a storied college career. Your prize is a one way ticket to hell Cincinnati.

FINAL Mock Draft (Ginger King)

Round 1 TeamPick
1Arizona CardinalsKyler Murray (Oklahoma)QB
2San Francisco 49ers Nick Bosa (OSU)DE
3New York JetsQuinnen Williams
(Alabama)
DL
4Oakland RaidersDevin White (LSU) LB
5Tampa Bay BucsJosh Allen (Kentucky) EDGE
6New York Giants Ed Oliver (Houston) DL
7Jacksonville Jaguars Jawaan Taylor (Florida)OL
8Detroit LionsT.J. Hockenson (Iowa) TE
9Buffalo BillsJonah Williams (Alabama)OL
10Denver BroncosDrew Lock (Missouri)QB
11Cincinnati BengalsBrian Burns (Florida St.) EDGE
12Green Bay PackersAndre Dillard (Wash St.) OL
13Miami DolphinsChristian Wilkins (Clemson) DE
14Atlanta FalconsDevin Bush (Michigan) DL
15Washington 
Redskins
Dwayne Haskins (Ohio St.) QB
16Carolina PanthersMontez Sweat (Miss State) EDGE
17New York GiantsDaniel Jones (Duke)QB
18Minnesota VikingsGarrett Bradbury (N.C. State) OL
19Tennessee TitansCody Ford (Oklahoma) OL
20Pittsburgh SteelersGreedy Williams (LSU) CB
21Seattle SeahawksRashaan Gary (Michigan) DE
22Baltimore RavensClelin Ferrell (Clemson) DE
23Houston TexansErik McCoy (Texas A&M)OL
24Oakland RaidersJosh Jacobs (Alabama)RB
25Philadelphia EaglesMarquise Brown
(Oklahoma)
WR
26Indianapolis ColtsDexter Lawrence
(Clemson)
DL
27Oakland RaidersNoah Fant (Iowa) TE
28L.A. ChargersRock Ya-Sin (Temple)CB
29Seattle SeahawksByron Murphy
(Washington)
CB
30Green Bay PackersJonathon Abram
(Miss St.)
S
31L.A. RamsChris Lindstrom
(Boston College)
OL
32New England 
Patriots
N’Keal Harry (Arizona St.)WR

Final Analysis: Our final mock before the big event. There’s some late banter that Arizona will not take Murray, but I think they have to at this point, especially after the hype video they released last week for the upcoming season where Rosen was included. Unless Rosen has been in on the ruse this whole time, which would make this the Greatest. Smokescreen. Ever. It’s a good thing there will be no cameras on Rosen tonight, because it’s going to be awkward AF – I’m talking Aaron Rodgers green room awkward – once the Cardinals take Murray. Good luck trying to get a first for Rosen, Arizona.

One name that keeps rising is T.J. Hockenson, the do-it-all Tight End from Iowa. There’s rumors a few teams in the Top 10 are enamored with him, including Jacksonville, Detroit, and Buffalo. He would also make a ton of sense in Green Bay. If Detroit gets a little scared about Montez Sweat’s heart condition, they could pull a little bit of a shocker and grab T.J. at 8.

Speaking of Bills Mafia, I think they’re going to do something different for a change and not reach for a need position [cough, J.P. Losman, cough, E.J. Manuel, cough, Leodis McKelvin] and instead let talent be the driver. That would be Jonah Williams, whom I think is the best offensive lineman in the Draft, and also happens to fill a need for Buffalo. The Bills need to protect Josh Allen, on the field and on Twitter. Jonah can at least help with one of those things.

Regarding New York’s real team, I think the Giants will end tonight with a new quarterback on their roster, and I think that quarterback will be Daniel Jones or Josh Rosen. Ideally, the Giants would use both their first round picks on defense (which was and still is their biggest weakness), and then try to get back into the First Round and take Jones (or trade their second round pick for Rosen). But that may be too much of a gamble for the G-Men to take, especially with rumblings that teams ahead of them, like Washington, have Jones on their radar. The Giants would rush the podium if Ed Oliver is still there at 6. Aaron Donald 2.0.

Also, get ready for a bunch of trades tonight. I think there’s some teams that would love to drop back a few spots and collect some additional picks. Don’t be surprised if a team like Washington makes a move to the Top 10 to grab a qb, to get ahead of teams like Denver and Cincy that may be looking at signal callers.

Buckle up, it’s going to be a wild ride tonight!