{"id":928,"date":"2013-07-31T15:05:50","date_gmt":"2013-07-31T19:05:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/bigredsportsmachine.com\/?p=928"},"modified":"2013-07-31T15:05:50","modified_gmt":"2013-07-31T19:05:50","slug":"tuesday-teabag-july-30-2013-alex-rodriguez","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/?p=928","title":{"rendered":"Tuesday Teabag, July 30, 2013 – Alex Rodriguez"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Side<\/a>

Side effects of PEDs include the body of a centaur.<\/p><\/div>\n

The Machine knew this day was coming\u2026and we hate ourselves for it.\u00a0 We\u2019ve been an A-Rod apologist from the start.\u00a0 There\u2019s just something about an aloof, narcissistic, mega-millionaire that we like.\u00a0 The Machine knew he was doomed as soon as he signed his (first) $250+ million dollar contract with the Yankees.\u00a0 No matter what he did it wouldn\u2019t be good enough.\u00a0 Even if he won you a World Series (which he did), an MVP (which he did\u2026twice) it would never match the obscene amount of expectations that were placed on his shoulders.\u00a0 Biggie was right: \u00a0Mo\u2019 Money, Mo\u2019 Problems.<\/p>\n

We even apologized for him during his first steroid controversy.\u00a0 \u201cHe didn\u2019t know what he was doing.\u00a0 Look, his cousin just bought some Boli and he took it.\u00a0 That totally sounds legit.\u00a0 Plus, everyone was (is) juicing, so who cares?\u201d<\/p>\n

Well, we have now seen the errors of our way, and have converted.\u00a0 The latest PED scandal with Biogenesis, where sources say there is \u201coverwhelming evidence\u201d of A-Rod\u2019s involvement, is it.\u00a0 That, plus the soap opera he\u2019s created with the Yankees with his rehab assignment, unauthorized second medical opinion, etc.\u00a0 Enough is enough, you cannot win our hearts back A-Rod\u2026unless you hit 14 more homers and passes Willie Mays\u2026that shit would be cool.<\/p>\n

Anyway, when the dust finally settles and A-Rod writes a tell-all book years from now or goes on Oprah, we\u2019re going to learn that his use of PEDs was systematic, controlled, and well-orchestrated (ala Lance Armstrong).\u00a0 Which makes his first \u201cadmission\u201d in 2009 all the more puzzling.\u00a0 In 2009, he went in front of the cameras and acted ignorant\/aloof about what he was doing.\u00a0 It was just something he and his cousin did, and he wasn\u2019t sure if he did it right or if it had any effect.\u00a0 If (read: when) this turns out to be bullshit, and we see the detailed records from the Biogenesis clinic showing his doping regimen, A-Rod will be exposed as not only a true fraud, but his narcissism will grow to Anthony Weiner-like status.<\/p>\n

Now comes the report<\/a>\u00a0that all of the Biogenesis players are ready to cut a deal with MLB\u00a0and accept their fate\u2026all that is, accept A-Rod.\u00a0 This has obviously angered the MLB\u00a0brass, who are looking at every possible way to suspend him, including a lifetime ban.\u00a0 One thing A-Rod\u2019s got going for him is if there\u2019s anyone that could screw this up, it\u2019s Bud Selig.\u00a0 Remember Bud: in the eyes of the CBA, MLBPA, and the inevitable arbitrator that will be hearing A-Rod\u2019s appeal of any suspension, A-Rod is a zero-time offender.\u00a0 Tread carefully, Bud.<\/p>\n

As this story develops daily, A-Rod is looking more and more like an image-obsessed diva that feels he is above the law.\u00a0 He makes Barry Bonds seem reasonable and likeable.\u00a0 With Barry, you knew what you were getting.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t mince words, knew what he wanted, what he needed to do to get there, and didn\u2019t give two shits\u00a0about what anyone thought.\u00a0 With Alex, it\u2019s like he hired a (very bad) political strategist to create this persona of a na\u00efve ballplayer who innocently stumbled upon PEDs.\u00a0 Are they both narcissistic?\u00a0 Of course, but Barry never tried to hide who he is<\/p>\n

Where will this end up?\u00a0 Who knows.\u00a0 If MLB\u00a0gets its way, A-Rod will never suit up again.\u00a0 If the Yankees get their way, they can void A-Rod\u2019s contract.\u00a0 If A-Rod gets his way, he gets to play again and continue his homerun quest (there\u2019s a nice $6 million bonus if he passes Willie).<\/p>\n

To boil it down:\u00a0 it\u2019s all about the money.\u00a0 Forget the records, the hall of fame, the glory of the game.\u00a0 The real fight is all about the benjamins (baby).\u00a0 The Yankees owe A-Rod $114 million. \u00a0That money is guaranteed\u2026unless MLB suspends him.\u00a0 The Daily News<\/a>\u00a0writes that A-Rod\u2019s plan is to play at least one game, and then retire based on the hip injury, thus guaranteeing the remaining $114 million.\u00a0 He\u2019s desperately doing everything he can to get ahead of the impending suspension, while the Yankees and MLB are doing everything in their power to thwart him.\u00a0<\/p>\n

Who\u2019s going to win?\u00a0 Who should we root for?\u00a0 It\u2019s tough when everyone in the equation is the villain.\u00a0 A-Rod doesn\u2019t deserve the money, the Yankees don\u2019t deserve to be let out of a dumb contract, and Bud Selig doesn\u2019t deserve to look like the hero (he\u2019s no RGI).<\/p>\n

One thing that is clear:\u00a0 they\u2019re all worthy of teabags.<\/p>\n

Enjoy your teabag.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Machine knew this day was coming\u2026and we hate ourselves for it.\u00a0 We\u2019ve been an A-Rod apologist from the start.\u00a0 There\u2019s just something about an aloof, narcissistic, mega-millionaire that we like.\u00a0 The Machine knew he was doomed as soon as … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[26],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-928","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tuesday-teabag"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p2Bp3y-eY","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/928","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=928"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/928\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":930,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/928\/revisions\/930"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=928"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=928"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.bigredsportsmachine.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=928"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}